I am sure we can all name something we have done that we deeply regret and that we are deeply sorry for. I know I can. In fact, many times over. However, there was one particular time that my actions were so out of line that it may literally haunt me the rest of my life. As always, let me share this story with you......
This particular night was sticky and humid. So I to took a shower before retiring to bed. As I stepped out into the hallway, wrapped in a towel, I noticed the ceiling fan just above me was on on full blast. Also, all the windows in the house were open and the fan was sucking the night air through the house. The hallway felt like a giant wind tunnel and by this time the temperature outside had cooled substantially. Ahhhh. It was wonderful. I felt like standing right there....wait....what was that?
Suddenly something flew past my head. It was something rather large but very silent as well. Whatever it was it flew right through my bedroom doorway and it began to circle around and around the light in my room. I quickly headed towards the doorway, pulled the door almost shut, and carefully peered in to investigate this nocturnal interloper. Then, it was like I almost had a flashback of sorts. In fact, my recall of this event was so vivid that I almost had a premonition as to what it was that flew into my room.
Years earlier, before I left home, I saw what I thought was a bird flying around in the living room downstairs. I remember my lovable but very dumb cocker spaniel kept trying to jump up into the air and grab this bird with his teeth. Each time he jumped he made a weird snorting sound. Pathetic. Anyhow, I suddenly watched in amazement as this bird flew right up and stuck to the ceiling. Then I realized in horror that was no bird but in fact...a bat!! And, it probably had rabies!
Well I can remember grabbing a broom and taking a few futile swings at this tiny beast and completely missing. Uh, Dave, it has radar sense...duh! And, even that night, the ceiling fan was on upstairs. Well, this bat eluded capture, or bludgeoning, when it flew right up into the ceiling fan vent never to be seen again.
Flashback! De ja vu! Here I was again, over ten years later, in nearly the same circumstance. So, when I peered through the tiny way between the door and the doorway I was almost not surprised at what I saw next. The little winged visitor seemed to have two little pointy ears and a flat face. I noticed this when It did a close fly by. So, that was my room with my bed already prepared for a good nights sleep. And now, there is a bat, probably with rabies, flying around in there. So what the heck was I going to do now??
Well, perhaps it was the after effects and delirium from a high fever I had a few days earlier? Or, maybe some intrinsic drive of self preservation? Who knows? All I knew is that I was still ill, very tired, and I would be darned if that thing was going to rob me of a good nights rest! So, I suddenly realized that this bat was flying around the light on my ceiling fan. The fan was turned off. The switch was just a few inches inside the room to the right of me.
An evil grin crossed my face. "Let's see how good your radar sense is now".
I quickly reached inside the doorway and threw the switch. I then slammed the door shut trapping the bat inside. Now, all I had to do was wait. I heard the low hum of the fan as it powered up. I could then hear the fan blades begin to turn faster and faster. This fan was also a little lopsided so the chord used to turn the fan on and off would shake back and forth hitting the glass on the fan light when the fan reached a certain speed. Tack, tack, tack, tack. Well, it didn't take long until I heard a very profound, "Thuddd'! I let out a triumphant, "Ahh ha ha!!"
So, just to be on the safe side I allowed the fan to remain on and I waited a few minutes longer to make sure the intruder was out cold. While I was waiting I also went out into my dad's office and found a steel baseball bat. I was going to make sure this rabies infected pestilence would never bother anyone again. I took the baseball bat upstairs and walked up to the door. I still couldn't hear a thing except the hum and spinning of the ceiling fan and the tack, tack, tack, of the chord on the glass. So, I slowly turned the door knob and gently gave the door a small push. I had no idea what to expect or what would happen next.
I carefully looked in the room. When I saw no sign of the little bat whatsoever I became even more brave. I opened the door entirely. Still, no bat. I did notice that my window was closed so it couldn't have gone out there. I looked on the floor. Nothing. I scanned all the walls, ceiling, and curtains. Nothing. Then....I noticed my closet.
I cautiously, with the baseball bat in front of me this time, tip toed over to my closet which was open. I used the baseball bat to sift though each individual article of clothing. Not a sign of the blood sucker. I couldn't believe it! Where did it go?? I then began to scan the room but I was pessimistic. That bat HAD to be in here somewhere. Flying though closed windows, doors, and walls seems to defy any physical law I know of. Therefore, even if I didn't see it, or find it, logically it was still here....somewhere.
But if you think for one minute I was going to sleep in this room now? After this? Needless to say I slept downstairs that night in front of the 56 inch television so it wasn't all that bad. But, even the next morning I went upstairs to check the room and still no sign of the bat.
Well, I have to admit that it took several nights before I got comfortable enough to go back upstairs and sleep in that bed. However, I eventually did and that bed slept a lot better than the couch that's for certain. But I will never forget what I saw when I woke up the next morning. I remember my alarm clock going off and I reached over and smacked the snooze button. When I sat up in bed I just sat there a few seconds still feeling sleepy and lethargic. Then I noticed something way out of the ordinary.
On my alarm clock, less than a foot from where my head lay all night, were what appeared to be two or three little pellets of some kind of animal droppings. Those weren't there last night when I went to sleep or I am certain I would have noticed. It looked like someones pet mouse had relieved itself on my alarm clock. These droppings were very small and so small in fact they could have come from......a bat?? Yes of course! What else could have left those souvenirs there??
Gasp!! No! It was as if that bat was in the room all along, waited till I was sound asleep, and left those droppings so I would see them when I woke up. As if to say, "I know it was you! Know this: my fangs have your name on them and just when you least expect it I'll get you back!" Noooo!!! EEEE-EEEE-EEEE-EEEE!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment